Foster children have a lot to deal with in life, more than the average child obviously.
Most foster parents who have brought up children of their own will have experience of bringing up average children. Average in terms of their damage. So it follows that most foster children will be carrying baggage that is new to us.
This is why we get regular home visits from our Blue Sky social worker. They...
Wednesday, February 25, 2015
Sunday, February 22, 2015
EMOTIONAL LABOUR
Jargon alert. There's a new phrase that affects foster carers.
'Emotional Labour'
I heard it on a Five Live interview this afternoon, talking about the work and pay for people who do general caring. The interview centred on the new buzz-phrase; 'emotional labour'.
When I first heard them say the phrase I guessed she meant that when you are caring you use up emotional labour in the same way that...
Wednesday, February 18, 2015
SKILLS TO FOSTER
I was just in the act of replying to someone who posted a comment on the blog, the person is gearing up to start fostering, about to do "Skills To Foster".
It took me back to when I was there.
When you apply to become a foster carer you have to build a portfolio which is basically a file containing information about all the things that you've done in your life that are likely to be some kind of...
Monday, February 16, 2015
A KEY ISSUE
This post isn't so much about fostering as about parenting and the pitfalls.
All the hoo hah about Fifty Shades reminds me of a very funny moment in the playground about 2 years ago.
The school were having a Cowboy and Indians day, where pupils could come in dressed up.
I didn't bother with mine because the whole dressing up thing is fine for mums with time on their hands, and the staff love it,...
Wednesday, February 11, 2015
FOSTERING AND BIRTHDAY PARTIES
There was a fuss in the news recently because a parent whose child didn't show up for a classmate's birthday party was sent an invoice for, I think, the cost of a ticket for some adventure park or something.
Then another fuss because a well-off family issued invitations to children for their child's birthday which requested a gift of around ten pounds rather than actual birthday presents because...
Sunday, February 08, 2015
A HOLIDAY FROM CONTACT
One of my fostering friends has a young boy staying with her at the moment, obviously I have to be very discreet talking about specifics.
I can tell you this, and it's the thing I want to tell you.
For good reasons, he doesn't have Contact with anybody.
Guess what? Everything's great. Or, at least, much better than it would be if he'd had to be piled into a car and stuck in front of the people...
Thursday, February 05, 2015
NIGHT TERRORS
It's 5.00am
Been awake since 4.00am. Crept down and made a cup of tea. Sitting at the kitchen table.
Sleeping is hit and miss at the moment.
One of our foster children has night terrors.
Blast from the past for me; my youngest child was so scared of the dark the only way he could cope was if there was somebody with him, so we slept in the spare room together, he and I. Until he was twelve. Tried...
Tuesday, February 03, 2015
WHAT'S FOSTERING LIKE?
I find that people don't ask "What's fostering like?"
If they find out you foster they tend to ask about the child you are looking after, and you tell them what you can, which isn't a lot, out of respect for their privacy. I keep it positive too, which helps remind me of the things that are going well.
But it's a good question; "What's fostering like?"
In one way it's a bit like an arranged marriage....