WHY DO FOSTER CHILDREN FIND IT HARD TO MAKE FRIENDS?

School holidays are no holiday for the foster parent. They're no holiday for any parent, but I find them harder work than with my own children, and not just physically. With my own children it was easier to get a balance between the 3 ways of spending a block of days when there's no school; those...

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CH-CH-CH CHANGES

One of the biggest changes in my time in fostering came in less than a year ago.  It didn't get as much attention as it deserves, probably because it's good news and as we all know, it's bad news that makes the headlines. The change was simple. Before 2014 children in England could be looked after only until they were 18.   Today they can stay until they are 21. If you think about it,...

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AN ADULT IS MORE LIKE A CHILD THAN A CHILD IS LIKE AN ADULT

Part of the problem foster parents have to overcome is that foster children often look like any other child. When you start in fostering you half expect them to arrive at your house with a black eye and torn clothes, crying and underfed. But 99% of any damage is often internal, hidden from the naked...

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WORDS ARE ALL WE HAVE

The best way out of a problem is often to talk about it. That's official; psychiatry has been called 'The Talking Cure' from day one. But not everybody is able to, especially young children. I remember my eldest, when he was barely three, I took him to a park where there was a climbing frame. Only a little one, but it was huge to him. He started cautiously and it took him a while, but he made it...

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NEW ARRIVALS

We've had a spare bedroom since one of our placements went home. It's ready for a new occupant, bed made up, changed sheets - obviously.  I've hung the wall mirror back up; previous child said it was spooky.  Every time the phone rings I run to it, it could be the Blue Sky placement team with; 'Would you consider taking a child who...?' In all my years I can't remember anything in life...

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FOSTERING AND CHRISTMAS

If you're a foster parent, maybe you shouldn't try too hard to make Christmas perfect this year. It was terribly sad that 1700 people have lost their jobs with the closure of that steel plant at Redcar, Reason Christmas is in my mind is that the TV interviewed lots of local people about the Redcar closure; the men all talked about staging protests and marches. The women talked about something else; "Christmas...

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OUR SONS AND DAUGHTERS

FOSTERING'S UNSUNG HEROES This month is the Fostering Network's annual campaign to honour the children of foster carers and the part they play in fostering. We carers know that our children are probably fostering's greatest unsung heroes and we should all take a moment to reflect on how much they contribute to everything we do. That's not to say the presence of one's own children is make or break,...

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