HOW DO FOSTER CARERS STAY SANE? I attended a school Parents Meeting this week, they laid out what they were about, with a PowerPoint. The first slide was what they needed from us for the children. The first request was "SLEEP". The teacher said "We need the children to be fresh and ready to learn each morning, so we ask you to make sure they get enough sleep every night." I didn't want to...

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I'M THINKING OF GETTING A TATTOO What is the status of a foster child? In your family, I mean. We open the front door and a complete stranger crosses the threshold, often with little more than a carrier bag of tatt and a precious cuddly toy. Their baggage, and plenty of it, is in their poor little heart. Look at it from their point of view; they've joined a strange family. But who are they to this...

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I am writing this fast, as I have a ten minute window between getting the breakfasts out and loading the car for the school run. The dreadful shooting of the two policewomen is all over the news, but because the journalists need something to "discuss", the tragedy has turned into a debate about whether the police should be armed; yeah right, like in America, where you're much safer... Every time...

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HOW DO OUR FOSTER CHILDREN AFFECT US? They say dogs grow like their owners, or maybe it's the other way around. Then there was a Woody Allen film I remember, called Zelig, about a man who turned into whoever he was with.  I remember a training session from way back, where we learned about...

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BAD PARENTING - IT'S EVERYWHERE! I suppose I've always kept an eye out for low-grade parenting, I don't really know why. But ever since I started fostering my radar has got even sharper. I find myself working out what's going on and how it might hurt the kids. I've only challenged parents in public on two occasions and got a mouthful back both times. Both parents were below the breadline,...

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DOES THERAPY WORK? We come into contact with a lot of people who have problems in their head. The children we look after have mostly had a terrible time, and it's messed with their mind. Our job is to give them a safe home and feed and clothe them. In a stable, loving family. But is it our job to make them get better? If a child has been injured in a car crash, and her life is in danger, they're...

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THE FOSTERING DIET THING Here I go again. For the umpteenth time since my teens, I'm going to try to get into shape.  As usual, my plan is bulletproof. Using a change in circumstances to help change mindset, from tomorrow I'm going to do 500 calories every alternate day eating normally on the other days.  The change in circumstance is the end of school summer holidays. Nobody...

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Fostering and Witchcraft When the schools go back after the summer holidays many foster carers will go down with a headache, a funny tummy, a summer cold. Maybe all three. This is because when the kids are with us every day, we don't have time to be ill. Our body refuses to let these sorts of ailments come out. It's storing them up for later, when we have time to be unwell. The official medical...

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