"SOCIAL WORKER"? MORE LIKE "SUPER PAL"

 We've had a change of our Blue Sky social worker, a temporary change, but quite a lengthy one.

Maternity and all that! Congratulations to our regular social worker and her partner, and their new baby.

I struggle to find words that are adequate to praise the people that Blue Sky send out to help and support us.

So; while our regular SW was away we were provided with a new one.

A new SW can be a big change, your lifeline is hugely important. The person you get is a big part of your whole life, not merely your fostering.

There are many people who are 'thinking' about giving fostering a go.

I remember our trepidation about taking the plunge, but, as it was something I'd identified as being kind of on my bucket list, I overcame nerves and doubts and, one morning, sitting at our kitchen table, I googled 'fostering near me' and Blue Sky came up, so I picked up the cordless and dialed.

It was such a moment that I still have a flashbulb memory of all those years ago waiting for someone to pick up.

Now that I'm a grizzled veteran of this amazing profession, I feel the need to toot the horn of the social workers who have become the cornerstone of our lives - all of my family, not just me.

Fostering is, for most of us, a leap into the unknown. Not entirely unknown; most of us have experience of family life (it's not essential; singles are among the best fosterers I  know). Equally most of us  have had children of our own (again, not a deal-breaker; one of the most brilliant foster mums I've ever met had no kids). And on top of those experiences, every single one of us was once a child, and we can draw on that enormous experience to build understanding of the young people who arrive at our door.

But it's still a leap into the unknown.

Mind, so's taking a partner in life, having children of one's own. Buying a home, getting a job, going abroad. So many leaps, yet fostering seems a particularly big leap.

I'm sitting here wondering why?

Perhaps it's the responsibility. Also the fear of failure. Then maybe it's the concern that somebody in your circle will warn you off it, and you don't want to prove them right. Then you realise that there are countless smaller unknowns in fostering and you start wondering if you're stacking up endless problems for yourself and your home life.

Enter your social worker.

They pull no wool over anyone's eyes, they have the facts and the details, they also do one thing that blows all the uncertanties to one side. 

They believe in you.

There's not enough self-belief in many people (mind, there's too much self belief in some).

I've believed for a long time that the best parents are the ones who worry about whether they're any good as parents. The worst ones are the ones who think it's a piece of cake.

Well for what it's worth, I believe it's even more the case with fostering.

The best foster parents are the ones who worry if they're good enough.

And that's where your social worker steps in.

So; was our stand-in social worker up to it?

When it came to her last day with us, there were almost tears.

Delighted to get our long-standing person back - she's almost family, but never withour her understated professionalism.

But saying goodbye to yet another person we'd long for as a friend, a mentor, a guide, was borderline heartbreak.

So, what I'm saying is this; to anyone thinking about giving fostering a go, be clear that for all the ups and downs of it, there will always be one enormous up; the ever presence of the sort of person in your life you've only dreamed of.

Until you foster.