Yes, I foster.
But it isn't my everything. I keep it in perspective.
I live in the real world too; all of it.
Our Blue Sky Social Worker visited this week, brilliant.
They see their carers once a month or more if necessary.
They're helping us with anything we need help with. They're checking to make sure we're not feeling the heat of fostering too much.
Or the heat of life itself come to that.
The thing is; you can't foster at the top of your game if you're not on top of things.
She showed up on the stroke of 10.00am, never been so much as a minute late that I remember, and she's been our social worker for years.
Always a huge smile and a fuss of our dogs, hangs up her coat and comes into the kitchen with her work-bag that looks like a small stylish overnight bag. Sits in her usual seat at our kitchen table, bag goes down at her feet never on the table. She fetches out a small notebook and pen and lays them in front of her, just in case we thought this was purely social. Always impecably dressed but informal. At some point she'll get her mobile phone out, to Google some information or put something in her diary.
All part of the service, putting us at our ease.
Sometimes she'll opt for a herb tea, this time she just wanted a glass of water.
And off we go.
Two hours of chat about me and our family. We talk about each family member and their ups and downs. We talk about the foster members of our family and their ups and downs. She knows us all inside out.
We go over the ins and outs of everything human. If one of the kids is having a bad time we discuss it, and the impact it has on me. We laugh and celebrate the good things too. She always reminds us where and how I'm doing a good job.
She'll cheerfully answer questions about herself and her young family, but then steers it back to us. She's caring for us, sussing out that we're all well.
It's like having a professional friend.
I mentioned that I'd been asked to do a bit of mild part-time work. Literally once a week for a couple of hours. I can do it at home and when it suits. Half an evening when the kids are all sorted and there's nothing on TV. I can continue any fostering duties around it. She was delighted for me, then began apologising that she needed me to read and sign a standard form that Blue Sky give to fostering folk if they take on new work of any kind alongside their fostering. It's a wee document that reminds fostering folk that fostering is their big thing and it wouldn't do if they suddenly prioritised a job over their fostering.
She stressed that she knew we never would lose the tiniest fraction of commitment to our foster kids, and that in my case the document was almost unecessary, but hey ho we might as well comply.
She made me feel 100% that we remained trusted and valued, but I'd recieved a mild and polite reminder of priorities.
"Not that it's necessary in your case!" she kept saying.
The whole thing, small and beaurocratic though it was, couldn't have been handled with more polish, professionalism and humanity.
I've kept the world in it's place in my life, and my fostering in it's place too.
We booked next month's session as the clock neared 12.00, the signal our session is nearing its end.
Another minor professional touch; she doesn't have a clock in her eyeline, and she doesn't keep checking her watch. She has her phone out and will use it for something towards the end of the session. I think she's checking the time but ensuring I don't think she's impatient to get away.
So off she went on the stroke of midday, still smiling as though she'd had the best time.
We had.
And a lot of work was done without anyone noticing.
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